I sowed a bit more grass in our back section today. It's actually kinda cool sprinkling it over the soil, then watering it and watching over the weeks as it grows. I may get to like this gardening lark yet!
The smallest member of the Pokemon family is the Josh-Bo pokemon. Josh-Bo is round, cuddly and communicates in squeals, gurgles and snorts. He looks best in cute little one-piece outfits, and warm polar fleece suits on cold days. He does not look good in sailor suits his grandmother bought him!
Mostly Josh-Bo is friendly, accommodating and darn cute. That's why he's so deadly — his attack is unexpected. Josh-Bo has three main weapons. The first is a stream of golden liquid emitted straight up into the air when he's lying, clean, dry and naked on the couch. The liquid covers everything around it. The second is a vomit of putrid white milk, brought up most usefully over black clothes just before you're going out for the day. All will seem calm, and then the Josh-Bo will attack, opening the mouth, turning sideways slightly and letting it all flow out.
But the most deadly of Josh-Bo's weapons is more subtle — it's slow and inexorable. It happens during the night and takes full effect in the late afternoon hours. It's builds up to intolerable levels over the course of months. Sleep deprivation! He inflicts it in his smiling way, waiting for the night you most want to sleep, and then pouncing, waking at 3am and demanding attention.
At the age of three years, the Josh-Bo pokemon transmorgifies into the evil Matt-Chu pokemon — the most powerful and deadly of the pokemon family. Matt-Chu is smart, ruthless and unstoppable. And if all else fails he reverts back to Josh-Bo type behaviour.
Matt-Chu is most noted for his high pitched whine, something that can be heard across great distance, turning those caring for him into nervous wrecks who resort to yelling at each other and demanding that the other one deal with the Matt-Chu immediately.
But Matt-Chu also has another weapon, newly developed, but more powerful. The incessant questioning. A true story might help give an indication of how this renders his opponents mute and helpless …
One night (that would be tonight) Matt-Chu was eating dinner with his parents. He didn't want to eat his vegetables, so complained of a sore tummy. His mother asked him if he knew the story of “The Boy Who Cried Wolf”. No, said Matt-Chu, so his mother told him the story.
He listened, wide-eyed as his mother told of the boy who cried “wolf” for a joke again and again, so that when the wolf finally did come, the villagers did not come out to help the boy and the sheep were all eaten by the wolf. His mother asked Matt-Chu if he understood what the story meant.
“A policeman should have killed the wolf” said Matt-Chu.
“Well”, said his mother, "the policeman didn't come because the boy cried wolf too often."
"But it's the policeman's job to kill wolves" said Matt-Chu.
"Well, I guess so" said his mother
"Are there wolves in New Zealand" wondered Matt-Chu.
"No, there's no wolves in New Zealand — I heard a wolf when I was a little girl growing up though"[Dad's note: bad tactical mistake by the mother]
"In America?", asked Matt-Chu, sensing an opportunity.
"Yes"
"Are there wolves in America?"
"Yes"
"Did Peter [the boy in the story] live in America?"
"ummmm … well, yes", the mother sensed she was losing control.
"In Maine, in America?"
"Yes"
"Did the buffaloes kill the wolf?"
"No, buffaloes don't kill wolves."
"Oh, did the wolf kill the buffaloes then?"
"Ummm ... well, they might of I guess"
"Are wolves good or bad?"
"Neither, they're wild animals"
"Are there Indians in America?"
"Yes there are."
"Did you talk to one when you were growing up?"
"No, I didn't."
"Are Indians good guys or bad guys?"
"Good guys"
"Why did the wolf kill the sheep?"
"Groan"
Matt-Chu seized the opportunity. "Can I go watch cartoons on tv?"
"Sigh. Yes Matt-Chu, and I hope you learned your lesson!"
Link of the day
Shy Kids
For those times when your own kids are just not enough. The mind boggles!
Journals and blogs that I read regularly
Raising Hell
Feral Living
Hippycritical
Udder
My Life in 12 Point Font
Journal of a Writing Man
Some Jingle Jangle Morning
The Last Girl Scout
Potatoe.com
Journallife.com
Window to my Soul
Chickybabe
Sorabji.com
Yesterday's Makeup
Fifteen Milliliters
Fly Away
<
#
made by mom
?
>
Registered!
The Ageless Project
«
?
Blogging Mommies
#
»
Photo of tunnel copyright Bernd Klumpp, available from istockphoto.com